Tuesday, December 31, 2013

WE ESCAPED - From Beijing


Mr. Lash and I escaped from Beijing without getting lung cancer. I miss my servants, obvsies, but not the smog, crackdown against foreigners, and new restrictions on buying drugs over the counter. I couldn’t get my usual stash of Zopis to bring home in the diplomatic bag, so now I’m on the jetlag express and sleepless in London.

Staying up late watching old movies isn’t sending me to slumber. The dead glam heroines from the upper and downer years of Hollywood keep me awake analyzing them. Clever casting uses an actor’s biography. Men go to bed with Gilda and wake up with self-destructive Rita Hayworth. That's good casting. Bad casting has Gwyneth Paltrow as Sylvia Plath when nobody believes Gwynnie would gas herself over a man. She’d be more likely to bake a cupcake.

You’re supposed to drink camomile tea for insomnia, but the last time I drank camomile it made me dress like a plant. I even considered eating a tofu burger. I don’t want to be lobotomized, just catch up on my beauty sleep. There’s only so much Touch Eclat can do for dark circles.

I had no choice but to visit a witch (like the other Vivien Lash in my evil twin's new book, Spying on Strange Men). She had a bad-tempered cat and nostrils big enough to move in a family of five. She was formerly a groupie to Nick Cave, though I’m not sure if he knows that. She studied witch therapy with the person who taught the person who taught someone I’ve never heard of—not Harry Potter.

The witch was all for blaming Mr. Lash for my sleep problems. And to be fair, it was he who took me to China. But no, he doesn’t accidentally punch me when he’s asleep. That might knock me out at least. "This guy here," she said, banging the table until I checked to see if Mr. Lash was hiding under it, "has work to do on himself." Certainly he has work to do. Not on himself, on account of him being practically perfect. But I kept my mouth shut. Never disagree with a woman who keeps a broomstick handy.

A banishment ritual was in order so I lay on the floor and was covered in stones. The witch rang bells while the cat strolled in to scratch me. "Your cat needs a manicure," I suggested. When my session with the anti-Satan was finally up, she gave me a potion. It didn’t work, probably because I was told to dance naked on the full moon with my cat. I’m shallow not stupid. I know that tickets to the moon haven’t been sold yet.

Next stop, hypnotist-to-the-stars Serena not van der Woodson. It’s not clear if the stars are Venus and Mercury, or Kate Moss and Johnny Depp. Serena told me to imagine I’m on a fluffy pink cloud with loved ones waving at me. I was dying to laugh. Instead I faked a big snoozy trance.

Shelley Von Strunckel, the famous astrologer who teaches meditation in her home, was my next stop. A man in a mask had already made himself comfortable on the sofa when I arrived. Shelley looks like she means business. She told the mad genie in my head to go. And the mad genie clearly didn’t want to mess with Von Strunckel.

It worked. I'm fixed and sleeping. Anyone want some witch’s brew? "Shallow Not Stupidly Yours" - Anonymous

Thursday, December 12, 2013

MY LOVE-For You

It shall be the same,no matter as far I know It's being accepted, and reciprocated! For It can't go far long one handed, single sides' so you need to know you need to work on it, so it be there and it be all that I ever ask and wish from & expect as little as I could. It wont be long enough that i shall love you no more' for I am an experienced human, a emotional being and I know how badly it hurt's when you love and you don't get back! The wises and the smallest of little petite things maketh a difference, for they are backed by several other reasoning and logic, and practicalities of life and how things would work and how shall they be at resent and what future holds. I crave for you, and I have given you a hint. and for whatever the case it may be with you' I am not willing to come down to anything by love - for that is one thing I have always willing to accept and agree and spread and give. Until I one day find myself so hollow that I be all out of love.

"You might be running late on time, or you might be holding on to you past, for all I know whatever the reasons be, you shall be longing for someone else, or you might still be rooted to the strings of past. For how immature of immature you stand' and you do or do not willingly unwillingly understand the peculiarities of a loving heart - all I know I have been aiming quite high and low at times, for now I am the arrow and you are my dart"

Let it stop, and let it come to end, for I shall not rise, & not let my Love bend, unless I see you abide by my love and realize and comfort me in the way so same, for all I have is love ready to take in the risk, and win or fail at last. For all I know as of now. I am game. whatever u call it, whatever you name' get me close to you and tame' it might all sound at times so lame. whatever it be, whatever it shall, you and me are destined I guess, to take in the risk & gel. there for sure was a reason why we met. here I am ,waiting for you all set.

Enough have I already said, for now the ball is in your court to judge and relation thy you pledge, for I am a mere wanderer lost in love, for I shall subside if no longer you shall be mine, for wandering again for someone else, for something more. For don't call me a dog or a frustrated whore. I have always & shall love everything and everyone from the heartiest core. sweet it maybe, or it might be sour, for all I know, as of now I am pretty much sure!

I await for you, with the open door, to my heart, to my family to my relationship core, I am sure I might be boring at times, but am sweeter, and not sore, there might be thousands of reasons that shall keep us apart, for only I know one, that should make us together is my love and craving for you to find you in my life, as a perfect shore. There shall be many options welcoming you around I know, but I will be the one, shall be your forever, selfless, unconditional, loving to the core. Listen to my roar, I speak out loud, and call you my own. - Anonymous

Tuesday, December 10, 2013

FIGURED OUT Thy-Have you lately?

Not Everyone you could hear I Love You from, or say I Love You has that real significance until what you said, was accepted and emotionally considered and reacted upon with much more excitement and more emotional understanding and care and practicality of logical realities. verbal reactions are interestingly virtual, and imaginative as they might be seen and figured out. But what's true lies beneath the surfaces of folded testimonial self being, well catered and well addressed, with a touch of humor, and a connection that supports you much way longer in reality then virtual, followed by Miss You, and Want to be next to you craving for all this and that and finding all the excuses and ways to be with someone willingly, in admiration of the very fact, tat you could just spend you entire day rejoicing being with someone,who would take you as you are, and shall abide by all the pros and cons of a structural habitual understanding of human sanity and insanity at the same time, no matter how sane, adulterated or selfless/unconditional it be.

Irrespective of caste creed orientation gender bias & all the status quotient. In the process of figuring out the so called relationship that you name and tag it with, no matter how deep understanding of the truer self and thy you shall possess, but eventually it shall only be worth if its served on to thy platter to you & vice verse, with way to much reality & face to face being there, and not distanced love, comfort ,sharing, caring and philosophical interesting backup's with that sense of security,supporting a communication and fetishes of human mind and urges to pacify and conclude, subside let go, keep and put an end to.

There might be at times a wider or a thinner line between fondness and love, and it's all hysterically emotional at times, when you intend to let go look's and you know, you are with a worthy being, that makes you even more worthy of living a life, and not finding yourself alone, with a random number of people that communicate interact and virtually and in real lure you to attributes of personal and attachment syndromes of human psychology.

Thy & Thee, shall be there, for no matter either of them shall live or die, for hard as much as it get's for sometime, you just ain't let go the fact, that you had a worthy relationship,and you shall sit back and rejoice the memoirs of the past & live with them happily ever after - that very few, as little as it was was way beyond a friendship, that changed you & had a significant role and importance in your life. They come and go, & few remember we been part of there lives, few are the ones, that you might recall, shall be at the back of your head, and deep down heart, staying in the corner's or filled with respect, regards & love.

With so much around, and so many asking to be friendly, for whatsoever reasons, denials and acceptance that go handy. with you and them to be in a habit of fooling around or failing in love for real. Presuming , assuming, judging, and still moving on, going on, getting along with the past, present and the coming foreseeing future, and the life goes on, for everyone, here and there, me and you, they and all.

Let thy sit and explain thee, how clear the perspective of life be' for thy brain & heart need to grow, and find peace, away form the immature soul. For you could end up banging your head on the wall or playing flute in front of buffalo, and it shall not solve any' or punch on a boxing bag, to outburst your experienced and well taught and lived assumed amused/ill' hollow/narrow presumed belief's. It ain't worth if you don't gain and muscles, with the push-ups of your state of mind - from where you left it and risen to' if you don't learn form the past, & sit' laid back drowned in the old dig haunted past, and do not accept the newer reasoning?

Positivity in a communication, learning from it, and finding a humor in the little of the things said and done, shall make you find your way to a lovelier you and lovely everyone around, for then you shall know,what love is.

Unconditional it be or thy conditions that come from thy' shall loose the importance, & solve no purpose, and hung it all,putting it to an end- it has to be pure, faithful & good or it has to be nothing at all.

"Some call it an emotional approach of the loner self, for some name it a philosophy of a logical-intellectual mind,some call it a planted/seeded game of a corrupt mind. We all are in a mix, zig & zapped, pulled, flattened, sorted or in a mode of grind. For all I knew forever, So much it' difficult it was to find & figure thy truer/real loving kind" - Anonymous

Monday, December 9, 2013

When Thy Heart Spoke-It did a Great Job

My Dearest You' Glad to know, you are more then good, more then me. Just take care. & keep smiling, for I wish you all the wellness in breathes of thy life remains, and a hug that says I love you no matter what. And I shall be there beside ,you no matter how real or virtual, I shall, I will, stay. As long as you would need me' or you won't, I still would be there in some corner's of the soulful brainy brawny hearty outer & inner being, walled and limited, united and adjusted thyself.

In between all the virtual stigmatic words that were at times luring frustratedly ,so desperate, to love in the flesh and get lost in the realms of sexual fetishes and pleasures, for I shall never forget, and make you remember. That my soul was always pure, and honest to I was more curious to figure out who that heart n soul was, in a body that, craved for mere more or less known & unknowing. - I so want to hold thee , hug , kiss with thy closed eyes - blindly tagged with/as a label of any textual alphabetically or numerically' as much as a soul, & human with all thy sanity , experience and wisdom.

As much as I beg for forgiveness for all the while I was not being myself, or too myself I was adorned with, for could not suffice your emotional mental and physical cravings and talk to you or text you back. I hope I shall be forgiven and understood well, and appreciated for getting back you you, though a little delayed, but more the merrier, soon thy it all came.

No more pretentious, presumed assumptions judgements, for let thy be transparent to thee - backed by lured, captivated, chased chaos experiences and logistics of a peculiar adaptations of a life to thy habitual habitat - lost somewhere at times, and rejoicing in excitement, wondering it shall last for a little much time, phrasing tracks and lines, and limits to my admirable myself, and foolish thee. Depreciated, Withered & Worn-Off Me, Sincerely Yours lovingly foolish. learned, de-fragmented experienced, yet use to the so called back stabbing every time,Myself - (Anonymous)

P.S-Don't hurt or play with my love/heart/body and dislike and reject my emotions for you on a misleading mischievous unbelieving note and not so serious all the time. I don't like it if its not taken & is played with, and never is it kindly acclaimed and accepted, for else I shall be sorry for loving thee, as I shall no longer love. Adopt it, if not me & you shall never be all out of it.

Thursday, November 28, 2013

SEX vs LOVE

How Well - Intimate, Sexual Pleasures could Be-fool You! For it might just  lure your temporarily Infatuations!. Real People are Only the Real Friends with who you share much more then just Bed!, Half Of the Time We Think, Sex is the only Reason that binds us!, But its opposite, The More you could be Intimate in terms of Emotions, Values, Comfort, Care Understanding - All the more are your chances to grow and keep up with the Person in a Relationship/Friendship/Sex( I don't say it's bad - but there is a certain respect that one should abide by.

It's a mutual consent & admiration to get laid & It's not just 'Done away with & Forget Syndrome' - for Something that can make you so Naked (that you could shed your clothes & your soul - pouring on to for someone/ to someone! - For there is no place for any Artificial/Superficial longing & a selfish We' - It has to be more of Love, Soul Connect & a Craving to willingly understand someone so close that you could just be so Secure & So Emotionally Uplifted!

For Times these Sexual Agitations & Be-Fooling Games, make you loose your trust, faith & interest in Love/Relationship & Friendship, It should not be a Slutty Business, it should be more then that! - Desperation is one thing different, but keeping up with the mind body and soul,connecting to it beautifully is what matters the most! - With few of the Starting Love You's & Loads of things that you admit, & confess & are willing to do - to nothing of that sort after you are just finished up wrapping yourself_in_clothes - Getting done & over with Sex!

I wish if we could wrap our Soul's much more in Comfort in a way, that we never ever had to Cling & Hook on to Anything/Any One Else - being it just be one person! But i guess that's life, and everyone seems to be on a lookout for a new flesh & it hardly matter's how far and new you get, you forget the past and the real. & at a point when you realize that the past & the real was more/much better!, you realize you just got laid, and you just finished a useless but important business meeting, that just got over & somebody had to go back home! & maybe never return again & meet !

You crave for a person, in hope that someday - one fine day your love shall be admired & in return you shall get what you expect & get treated in the way you want, getting your expectations done with too - & not just the one sided Play!

"Either it be (Sex=Sex) or (Love=Love)", Ratio that I find solitude_in! It cant be an  Artificial Willingness to Keep that Fake Smiley on your Face & say all is well, Nothing is wrong!

Why don't we Connect with the soul's Why just get lured by the Physical - Outer Thy! - Anonymous

Shut'Up-You,You

Yelling to the dogs on the street, & birds in the oddest of weird times, hours of midnight to the wee hours, possibly when you just want to concentrate on something, or wanna go to sleep, and they are the only ones u would be listening to crystal_clear, and with n rhyme or reason, I don't know what would they be conversing about talking to themselves or there fellow beings, Only wish I could understand there language, and possible end up having a conversation with them. I love them, for sure, but its irritating at times, when you just don't want to listen to yourself even and then you will have a company who purposely - as it seem like, shall be those not so invited guests, making noises, & you would wonder, you are yelling & shouting at them, wish they could understand what it meant' but yes' eventually suddenly I would hear no more noise, & would be glad that I made sense, and they understood! Tried all the best to finish of with my work in the wee hours around 6ish, &  sleep, and I could not, then decided shall take a hot water bath(there as I stood, pouring the warm water on to myself, I wished I could keep on doing that, but then I would end up heating up all the buckets of water, and enjoying the bath, with no sleep and late nap & late work or no work) & then sleep, & that was just perfect! the wee-hour munching and hogging to the night-dinner leftover's, with more then one glasses of cold coffee, & finally quenching the so called hunger & thirst, for I know shall be standing upright, not wanting to eat anything until dinner, sufficing on to the tea & coffee only! Next morning I went talking to the Dog's asking them what was there problem? & he they just wagged the tail, & made some sweet noises, and I smiled, and my anger vanished! Birds been chirping too, but did not fed them today, there was already the last bit-over kept, so they might hog on to it. Then a little late I was already, with my Cell drained battery, & decide to log On to my Laptop & Net, checking stuff, while charging my cell, for a little while as much it could, and getting ready, in between criticizing the Bad Hairdo that looked not so good, but interesting (& I had no time to take a bath once again, so soon, it was cold and had less time to get all the things on the list done over with, Changed and was almost ready to pick my Lazy Ass to do some work finally. Meanwhile trying to fit in the Ear-Phones on to my ear, listening to the Awesome-st Songs, I kind of looking myself in the Mirror, Danced - felt good, doing that, & then I was out on the street, fetching a RickShaw to take me to do all the chores, & there were exactly two rounds!, First one had the first half of the work done, and after 45 minutes had the later half to be p planned and done, which eventually did not materialize for some reasons, but then it was a RickShaw Ride, home to the market, and back home! - It was my Post-Noon "Rickshaw-Puller'Ride"! Now back online for a while, with again a thought on my taste buds, as to what shall I order to day & eat finally , Lets See. here I sit with the Menu & make decisions. while chatting in between here & there to old & strange new peeps, interesting multitasking goes on! lol. The Nite Went & the Day Passed. - Anonymous

Off to Sky & On the Ground


"Let's fly, be high, let's fly, be high.Let's fly, our hearts flowing, together.Be high, it's rush will always last forever.Let's fly, be high.I will feel you in ecstasy.Let's fly, be high, let's fly. Unstoppable,Got me open, I'm falling dub,Raise thy toast, Oh yeah come on and let it fly.Let's go, let's let it fly.Get ready, let it fly"



Last Night' A friend said, come on let's fly & I said old on to me, hold my hand, and hug me tight, not let me slip or fall away' & yes blindly trusting you for no rhyme or reason, a blank mind but heart filled love, and I see nothing at all' for let's do it! Sometimes it's unconditional with condition's to love & respect the decision and needs that might be favorable or not so favorable for what the heck, no thinking, and just doing it, going for it. for as much virtual we could agree to most of the things and learn to say yes, and bend & change & go figure no why's and if's, & put but's and logical reasoning. At times u just want to go with the flow, with a blank head, peaceful heart, comforting just the moment. that you would be so content when you shall land on the ground,with a cheerful smile, & all the more lighter heart, knowing you just had a awesome flight, and you are really happy about it.


"I'm living just for the minute.You hoe... hold my attention,Your hug, you got me pumping for,dancing around, you would have thought. some alcohol & some slow music to top it up all. And I figured it all started with a smile and a wink." 


& thy friend asked me today where are you to which I replied "On the ground", since last night we were to fly, but then it was too clouded, so we decided we shall fly alter in the clear sky together holding each other, tight, & we shall wear some woolen's since its gonna be chilly, for yet sure I am that I wont need any warm clothes for your love heart & hug shall maketh it all worth. Sometimes the stranger's are you most trust on to, for the curiosity and excitement drives you crazy and weird, for no matter what and how it be' for if you let it go, and go with the flow, you know you can achieve and make the best worthwhile. for as Little pity things that you could rejoice and make you happy - with the good factor attached to it, for a emotional heart that shall find content and peace, and brain that shall not be busy working on the logistics of mathematical calculations of what not(if & but's), & that's how you shall live the moment. No matter what you tag the person as' what thy relationship you name, what difference does it make, if it was not real, and just virtual, for if it was fantabulously awesome, it was worth giving a try, as much as you loved it and felt good about it. Why do we all have to be limited to our emotions, perceptions, willingness to try stupid weird ,new things. irrespective of all the odds, why don't we just come out of the factors of so called good and bad, not sure, and unsure. For one life we all have, and we spend half of it, thinking way to much, and doing nothing worth, & then we waste other half in cribbing' loosing it badly!


"Today is the day to come and fly and baby don't worry, i'll be there to catch you if you fall 'Cause today, is the moment,for us to find it all. So Lets Fly, Lets Fly, Lets Fly,Till we find it all.So Lets Fly, Lets Fly, Lets Fly,Till we have it all. I need you to come up and fly with me,because I feel alive, when I have u beside me" - Anonymous

Tuesday, November 19, 2013

What's-UP

Hardly are people who would be curious to know what u ate. who cooked it & what's cooking? then what u like in bed, or it just finds it's way sorted and ended to what's'up and what you do, and how are you and so on! - rather if we had more topics to discuss about and had more merrier the conversations about much more then thy expected, we could certainly go a long way together.

For as they say way to thy heart is from stomach - I rather presume it to be willingly true, shall take thy to a newer perspective of dimensional interactive sessions, where no matter how good a cook you are, or don't no a thing to cook, you shall always be lured by several means of wider perspectives , rather sticking on to thy one. For the more topics of conversations thy strangers or friends have to share and talk about, the more friendly there relationships thy be, giving a way to a newer and healthier interactive sessions, it definitely can be calorie conscious or high in fat-never mind) - all it matter's is that we are talking and we are friends.

Discussing about how did your day passed & whats the plan for the coming one. What all did you got busy with, and what all is inside your head that makes you worry. from things that make you busy, and things that tell you how of worth and importance it is to share and take an advice of a friend, suggesting

for no matter we are far, & could not meet more often, or not at all in real, we still hang up with each other virtually, and its good to know, and share more then just everything and anything at times, for very rare are the chances of us opening to the other person willingly open heatedly, wanting to relate ,converse, and feel good.

How is the weather today, for anything or everything can just start up a conversation, for a list of things you are wanting to shop to a few people you are willing to meet, or kick!

therefore If I ask you what's cooking or share what I eat, don't presume assume or judge anything at all, for all I know and understand & abide by is - i am a person who shall keep y heart healthy for thy I keep my stomach full sufficing it with everything that's quenched and hogged on to!

you and me shall cook, dine, with all we could drink to and say cheers!. To Thy Friendship, Relationship, Sharing & Caring - Here I raise a Toast, and Live On. - Anonymous

Friday, November 8, 2013

Thy This - DISILLUSIONED Love

I_Love_You & Kisses(Muawh's) lately sounds more like a punch_line everyone virtually & in real holds on too it as if they would die, if they wont get thy Love & as if there life would stop there & then if it ain't be thy!. How easy & random, weird & funny, miserably fake has one gone artificially saying it across border's in various version oriented dialects. For thy Terminology was always the same - the one and only, but everyone seems to have been using it lately for there personal gratification syndrome - mutual admiration & self centered gestured ways of luring thy - one more of thy way 'added on to ways of enacting thy fake logistics of a practically unreal, unhealthy, inhuman, self-centered - political dramatics. I wonder how far would one go, faking it , climbing up the ladder on to thy shoulder, getting all thy needs attended and personified, & still not finding a way to deal with the real Love. Sadly' Blurred Loved I see going into ashes, rising & falling apart - all foggy, all so disillusioned are thy hearts have become, for they all think with mind & they would never be a peaceful soul, grounded aloof one day all out of love - with no one to love thy, shall then they crave & mesmerized be remembering thy Love, they ditched & betrayed, for there self centered being.

For experienced tell you, & your intuition guides you and makes you learn, warn about thy fake & thy real Love. I so wish there be a institution which could teach the realities of true love, and standing by it no matter what. - For everyone seems like taking it for granted and enacting upon as if they hardly care about it; faking they were the only ones who loved you truly & thy game they play, is much sought out and understood by the experienced heart & soul, for still not wanting to believe on to thy falseness - often judgmental based on presumptions & assumptions, the game be on, until one fine day, it all be wrong! - one fine day ,shall there be no one' singing to u lullabies & love song.

I wish Love never had a Tag with thy names' for all be blind' & love thee' irrespective of anything thy be!

if it matter's to you the most' let it matter in real' for one life one has' for less time we all got' to rejoice, love, be at peace, suffice & acknowledge thee. - Anonymous

See'LOOK - Let Me EXPLAIN

I Don't want bother u much! its just like, i feel secure sharing what's in ma heart n mind, with a stranger i call a friend, for unknown and at distance - my curiosity n excitement uplifts me & drains me at the same time , pouring ma feelings - out-bursting into utter surprised state of mind, that's emotional expecting and seeking a refuge in thy acceptance - full of love, and only love and with no limits, unleashing thy for wanting to surrender to sum one honestly for one more time, for loving sum one, like one of those romantic tender care comforting zones where u tend to loose yourself and the very u and just snuggle down with a hug, resting on thy chest n shoulders, with a tight never loosening hug & eyes that stare u , like u stare thy, and talking silently almost everything to nothing at all.

Don't permit me, such things, that shall make myself difficult to explain and thy be not reachable, from me, when I really want it badly in real, other then the virtual one.

For once I would ask u to love me, for my love is honest true irrespective of anything n everything, pure virtually and real, for it's no reel life dilemma dramatic theatrical acts, for I am the way I am, looking for all the love , for all the love and nothing but love, is all I have to give.1

I feel so comforting confronting you - saying i love you for no rhyme or reason! - I just love you, meaninglessly and unconditionally for all the communication so far that has been between us, has step by step brought me more closer to my feelings and clearer vision, speaking out to you my mind and soul, my heart & me!

I might crave for more, but it has to be mutual, I could follow my heart, and it could go on and on! - Anonymous

Self-SERVICE


We ain't here to amuse thy or entertain for free & if We do it, We expect the same from the other side. Depends on how well equipped intellectual or dumb we are to.keep the conversation going. It takes more then much of it always to make it going. Willing to spend time, energy, money, interacting - emotions,comfort,sharing & caring,longing,distanced outbursts, turmoils & smiles, excitement and curiosities. As much as I give you all, I expect the same, for there is nothing that is single handed, single sided. For with a span of time, we all understand the worth,value,usage,conditional behaviorism of thy human soul & flesh,needs,cravings,aspirations,expectations and urges. 

No it's entirely not your or my fault to presume,assume,judge each other. My answers in reactions to your so called queries of questions & vice-verse are just based on the talks those are contextual reference to thy built up - generalized realizations & logical,practical approached experiences of a lived life. we can very well conclude, based on our judgements, when we start too.

My very being with thy emotions,formalities,presumptions,judgements,perceptions shall spin & churned either in a grinder or a washing machine.dried & then put off hence forth laid on the platter to be served & worn with thy very honest & true faithful myself, being based on all the prior,present & future conversations & communications we had until, figuring out & knowing thy so far have we come a long way .& hopefully shall in a pure form with nothing kept in thy heart & mind(blank be it) for expecting just as little as the same (humanity) from thy in return, doing away with the obligatory formalities.considering and taking you as a friend and more.

for all i know - if i was not me i would not have had you, like we do now, in anticipation that you shall be yourself too.

Either you got to be a soul that's divine doing a free service to thy world(one's choice), we possibly could be one, though,irrespective of the odds, there shall always be a difference between the holy & the human, thy let us set a barter system, that shall prevail from now on, & then shall we learn how it works- giving and taking the same from each other respectively. - Anonymous

 


#Encounter - When you meet anyone, remember it is a holy encounter. As you see him/her, you will see yourself, for in him/her you will find yourself or lose yourself.

It doesn't matter how long we may have been stuck in a sense of our limitations. If we go into a darkened room and turn on the light, it doesn't matter if the room has been dark for a day, a week, or ten thousand years -- we turn on the light and it is illuminated. Once we control our capacity for love and happiness, the light has been turned on.

Thursday, October 24, 2013

FAKE - Thy SELF

Who are we faking too? Our own selves? What for, What good it be to anyone? From young teens, to youthful adult's, mature & older beings, irrespective of everything else!

Thy lonesome saddest people, who live in there own_world, self_obsessed , with no love around nearby in lives, but clinging on the fake lured ecstasy's of life, filling up all the blank spaces somewhere sometimes. Despite all the odds of living with/on virtual dimemas over social networking sites, they tend to suffice with self pity(not showing it to no one), reluctantly not agreeing to it. beside being secretive , not wanting to come out! So unreal for assumptions & presumptions they strive to live on with, not letting see light elsewhere beyond with self judgmental being themselves! falseness & superficial cravings!

Thy afraid to make friends, trust and show affection, increasingly slower on there aspects of finding differentiation between the real and fake, for they feel they are better off alone in the four walled world that they live in, with limitations and self sufficient ceremonial descendants, that they call there own, cheering up to the fake world and asking for attention & not letting there real self come out.

For there emotions might be real somewhere disillusioned to themselves and thy world they restrictively flee away from, and choose to be with the presumed human traits of there near by surroundings, where they find artificial thy few they assume to be real. For all the fruitful endeavors that only last as long as thy selfish need & urge longing is fulfilled. Sometimes its one of the many of the things that take a back seat!, a many of the so called reasoning and logic that permits and restricts ones own very soul mind and body to please oneself and others, with a no obligatory syndrome, or an obligatory one.

For lost is thy age and maturity of the so emotional misunderstanding they revolve around, unresolved much lie the issues that builds up the pressure and an outburst, that existed earlier and shall be in future, for they stay in present until they would later realize that what was was was, and what is is is and what shall be shall be! - not difficult to find millions of the social addict lonesome souls, that differ from one to another, with similar common habitual tendency, nocturnal to self fed foolish online blah-er's, finding peace with a chat that shall hold no meaning & importance by and large on a reality significance.

You will see them online most of the time, very few would understand and agree with the fact, (deep down inside) for why they are there, and for half of the other lot shall deny the factual understanding of acknowledging self to be the one! All the loner's irrespective of caste,creed, color,orientation if sit and do something about this hysterical fake fondness towards a unrealistic unkempt life, shall not come out in a easy way, much sooner, causing more chaos to there lives, & hamper others close to them!

Wednesday, October 23, 2013

Unkempt STUFF- It Happens

unkempt stuff - need_to_sort - they & thy' inside_out
When u tend to Start Talking more n knowing n taking sum-one for granted kinds as a friend and more or what ever your presumptuous mind might expectingly assume it all to be thy, no matter what it be at the back of your head, it tends to mislead u to such result oriented limitations where there are things on the contrary with a different angle all together other then out of the box" -  hidden agenda syndrome - unaware of the circumstantial result oriented, mischievous, emotional & practical Lively Experiences that tend to take u to a back_seat, for all said and heard earlier before & this cycle goes again with a newer ones, upgraded version. One kind of based on ones #experience of life, all learned & understandable, suffices a platform that pertains to a lateral thinking mind, that honestly Tell's you with a Warning Indication - Its all done n said now, No way its gonna harness any fruitful self sufficed interests and no way the other person takes u much more seriously as in real, its all a matter of a whole lot of things. so not one perfect logical explanation to that, but its always like it takes two to tango & nothing has to be one sided for real & no crocodile tears would hamper & over shadow an  intellect brain & a  pure heart - artificial thy be, for how long - we all at the end come down to mere reality of  what we are,  who we are and  how_we_are ! unmasking the mask - taming self, we stand concretely grounded
.

It Happens Like This, for Why Does it Happen This Way.
(Hindi)Aisa Hota Hai to Aisa Hota Kyon Hai

TALK on the PHONE


In the midst of those crowded streets, family around, & television sets, & music on the laptop, the groups of peeps discussing nothing that important - but so loud, and some one talking so loud on the phone,as if he was addressing the crowd! With a noise here, and a noise there, I understand every bit of all of it, but I happen not to hear the person who I am talking to. & those sudden gaps, that kind of try to reciprocate and understand what was said ,takes a while to actually making the conversation slower and it's somewhere or the other but not here!

how do I intend to understand what thy say, what the other person on the other side understand what I say! - for I assure I switch off my fans & water coolers, & I am secluded in a loner noiseless - pin drop silence,grounded -talk while I walk!

the bill that shines brighter day by day, after such talks, for I sit and think, what discussion it be, for it it was no talk, just an assumption of half of it being gone above head, & half of it that never had intentions of loosing its significance - heart felt! for joyous thy talk could be, for straight fro-to heart it could be! for much more then we assume to presume, we could have a well conversation somewhere, it all goes somewhere, other then thy ear, & then it settles down to some chores of busy mind, for heart that keeps silence for much are the times it says nothing -but says it all! For a minute we stand in excitement and for the next we fall! - with a mix of several communicative languages we pitch on too - small.big,high,low,fat,tall. & that's just not all!

for I advise we make a list of things that needed to be addressed while there is a communication to thy, so there on the other hand, no one ask you what how & why?

Sometimes you go blank, really mesmerized by someones talks, & at times, you say - what a pity, I rather play with my lubricated dolls! - A time well spent with a clearer elite, constructive conversation it thy be, for there are other several ways to communicate, but nothing more awesome then a mouth to ear - "we"!

request (hindi) kripya karkey shaant vaaatawaran main ayein, fir mobile par humaara number ghumaayein, or fir humsey guftagun karein!

request: (please do come in a peaceful environment, & then dial on the numbers on your cell phone reaching out to me to talk)

Thursday, September 12, 2013

MOUSE & The TASK-BAR



OK how do I stat, now, where do I start it all from. Well. 2 Days of sadness that made me quite irritated. I was like trying to work no matter what on my Laptop continuously , with all the necessary left over available options lately! First it's been some months, I don't know how come, and why, my Touch Pad(Mouse) vanishes (disappears from the Screen) - it's somewhere off the screen, & I don't know where it'll be? suddenly in between for a while. while I am in the middle of a successful working condition! Hitting the Esc button, once or more, along with a hand on the Key Pad, & Touch Pad. Solves the issue. Meanwhile addressing the issue and getting it back with a tricky act!

From Last two days, Suddenly, while I was working on my laptop, I could not see my Task-Bar(that's on the bottom side of the Screen! - Astonished to the sight, & irritated with the plight, I ran down my system off & on, setting on the default settings. Trying to find in the Task-Bar Options (Help) thing and Control Panel's and figuring out ways to resolve the issues, However the one thing that was missing routine was the Time & Date that I could see much often, along with the Sound Control that I could control as per my choice, along with other Pinned in Shortcuts for Net, and other various things! However I could over come the disadvantage of the Missing Task-Bar, although, it became little stupid, Using the Alt-Tab key's for Peeking in the Windows that were open, and and a number of various other things. I was not much perturbed with the fact, though things were running as they had too, but then suddenly something happened and the I got my Task-Bar back, though the Control panel Help Options etc.(Now I don't even remember how and what of it) Never-mind!

I mean I was happy (thrilled would be the precise word though)  that I did not had to take my Laptop to the Vendor, or ask someone for help!

As of now the Task-Bar is working fine, and so is the Mouse, I guess I need to give my Laptop a little rest now, Else I would be seeing a lot of things missing and not working! sigh! It's like everyone should be imparted with this technical knowledge about controlling one's PC/laptop, else would be difficult for anyone, everyone, facing such stuff, and crying out for HELP! - these gadget's I tell you. God I only know, how all terrific thing's I have been witnessed lately! May it be Tablet' Mobile, PC, laptop. & so on!

Interestingly, here comes the Task-Bar, & sadly' here goes the Mouse. LOL - Happens all the time with me, I guess I am used to it by now! - I guess all is well that end's well!

The LOVE-ADMIRER



It's not My Love or Your Love' It's Always Thy Love!

What if I could Love Everyone in my Friend List, and Get Love in Return! - Do We need to be precisely putting in a Tagged Version of "Why do you Love Me Syndrome Act"
or need a Reason to Love Someone, & Not just like that, I mean if you sincerely feel you Love, You Love, & I agree that you don't have to have or give the same kind of Love Feel In-Return,but if you co , unconditionally without any lateral thought process, "It would just be so wonderful" - I mean how less and how more are the times when you can actually say this 3 letter word" I Love You". You don't need 2 be bias on any grounds! until there is Love from the both ends, it's not a potentially correct Love Story! - There can be various platforms of your Love - Don't you Love God? Parents? Partner? Dog? Food & Drinks that u eat n drink - Likewise - Why don't we feel much comfortable and easy telling anyone, random, stranger for that matter, who we would like, or like to say - I Love You!, Does it only have to be a Physical Endurance and Emotional One-ON-One to Fall in Love or Love Someone, or Like Some One for that matter, that you could just say that easily that you Love him/her/it?

There are People who Say" Please don't talk about Love' Why should One Not? If I do, I do! If you cant that's your Problem, Whatever happened in your past, with the Odd Experiences, that comes in every persons life at times, it does not make them decisive not to fall in Love again! It's not how you love, its who you love, and with what intentions! How Pure your Love is. Past, Present & Future, does not guarantee anything in Life. It's our choice who we accept and what we expect, and then It's the way it has to work and not work, Once cant just do nothing to make it work, after one point. If I am told not to Love' I would rather be not in a position to Live My Life the way I want to. If Someone tells you Please Don't Love Me' or don't get into Love Sort of thing with me, it imply that the person is not willing to be Loved, and shall in return not give any Love, - What good a Soul and Body be, without Love?

No One has ever been Happy with No Love!

There goes nothing - by saying - I Love You" to anyone, But it goes a lot when you say" I Hate you- to sum one.

It's Always good to spread positive vibes and not the negative ones, not even would it be of any purpose if the thing or a person ain't Lovable Enough, choosing to be in your daily needs requirements list's, talking and meetings!

Simple example: What good be the people in ones Social Networking List, doing if there was no Love, They will be just mere ID's? - For it's a means a way to cherish that Love, Fondness and Care & Being in Touch. that revolves around you and they' - for all that matter's is Love, and for rest it's all a piled up Infatuation & Materialistic Comfort!

You need guts to say "I Love You" (Whatever it be.No Matter What)

Try a simple thing! - Whenever you can, Go & tell your parents that you Love them! & all those people who are there with you, etc. Also Try telling all the things that you can, that u are surrounded by like, water 'while u bathe, Food' that you eat, Clothe' that you wear, - You would have so may things to Love, & You would in return feel all Loved, & You would learn the importance of the terminology - Anonymous, 36 Delhi, India

THIS & THAT



"There is no such thing as just existing. Everything is in service to everything else. Existence is giving and receiving. A stone gives and receives no less than a saint."

I lately been dreaming about things, rather not dreaming, its like, they are all the time, from everywhere in my head, From all the conversations that I might have done, and remember chatting on the FB and WhatsApp lately(When was the last time I was on it, - don't remember!, to all the Bank Details, the figures that created a chaos around my head, Wondering why did the Interest seemed low, What all accounts and what not. Friend Requests & Pokes seem to have been popping in my head, and so are the mouse click's that I keep clicking , as I flip pages, from one profile to another. From thinking about how do I have a controlled weight management regime, to what would be the ways to curb down my fat. Few Songs that would just not go out of my head. With extra Sleep, not letting me Sleep more, and getting up in between, and having nothing to do, and hitting the bed again, still tossing and turning around, fighting with the issues that bombard my senses. heart and brain - I quietly decide to juggle-up myself all up (as if "I was inside the washing machine, and I was being washed in circular motion, until i was all dried up") - What a Merry go round that would have been. At times, you end thinking all the nuances from day to day life, to the chores of your activities that you were busy in, looking forward to the rest of the things that are on your pending list for real long now! Shifting your thoughts from one agenda to another, and hogging and drinking on to something that could keep your mind busy for a while and shift your thought process from intellect logical thought process to cravings and likes!, Guess I have not been day dreaming lately, but Yes, I am not much at peace with thyself, for there are things that go around, come around, and you still try to settle down to lure yourself - with all is well quotient (when nothing actually is well at all) - a quick start to a decision making effort to pursue some likely healthy options and habits that could boost you up, you decide to do it from tomorrow (which never comes), so I decided to do it today, Now! as I finish my tea) & I am off to something or the other for sure now! cya in a while! - "For everything there is Google, and for everything else, you, yourself are the best person"! -

Saying to yourself what you would be; & then do what you have to do."
"Let the waters settle,you will see stars & moon mirrored in your Being."

True- I have seen it work like magic! & have witnessed moon and sun mirrored on to my very being! I have enough made the waters settled so far by now! and I wonder how often should and would I need to clean the water, since they have been settling from much time now! - Doing absolutely what I have to and meanwhile addressing the thought process with what I would be!

Here I get lazy, wanting to take a nap, & I wonder, is it a good time to put myself on the bed right now or what, Been a while I have been over sleeping lately, with dreams and though process of varied interests i my head, remembering the pros n cons of the things I achieved so far, the things that I already had, and things that I would be looking forward too, with no expectations, only worried about the current state of my mind engrossed on to so many things, that I have been feeding my soul lately. - i wish at times, I could keep my mind out of my body and keep it somewhere else!

For how many more days, weeks, months, years, I got at my disposal, have I done with and got all what I ever dreamed of, building up my Bucket List, on to what all was needed and desired, and striking off the unwanted, yet more on the practical needs and deeds to be harnessed and contributed at the same time.

Shifting from self urges to life long commitments, Conversations on the phone, to some meet's that require face to face acknowledgements, useless ones or the necessary ones!. Then keeping busy with the chores of daily routine; cooking, ordering ration, a walk, seeing yourself in the mirror and making poses, and suiting to you self as the world seems busy, with all the necessary that could keep yourself busy with! - Anticipating a few courteous (though unexpected) help and understandings, as more you grow alone! Anticipating sweet surprising invitations, and home made food to be cooked and dropped by a friend and accompanied along, a call asking if you were free to go along for a movie, or a walk/drive! It's not that all of us have quite a independent life, but at least we got one, why don't we live it the way we want to, if it's made your life too busy and not getting time from your own self, I guess it's time to shuffle and choose the best optimum things in and around your life!

Here I see those leaves scattered in front of me, in the balcony(Garden), & I say it to myself, what the heck! I need to put in time to clean it too. sigh! If only it could get cleaned itself, anyways, shall do it soon! real soon, today itself maybe!

It feels good when you are commented on what you wear, and how you looks! small things that really lift you up, no matter if it was told from heart or just for the heck of it, it's good to hear nice and wise words, at-least on the contrary it makes u wise and nice at the same time, with the positives you get, as well as the negatives at times to an extent, that help you change and grow!

You’ve got the best of both worlds. There are the things, which can take down a man, & lift him back up again. You might be strong but needy,humble but greedy.
Based on body language, shoddy cursive I’ve been reading.Style-quite selective though-mind is rather reckless. Well I guess it just suggests that this is just what happiness is &, what a beautiful mess this is! - Anonymous

YESTERDAY & TODAY



<YESTERDAY & TODAY>

Yesterday(Kal), Din kata kuch Baarish or safai or bina electricity key,sotey bethey, shaam ho gayi. Bada socha fir, aftr khoob decision decided aaj DOSA@Sagar Ratna hojayey, mehnga hi sahi, kaunsa roz hota hai- aaj apney aap ko kitchen sey aram deykar order kiya South Indian , AC ki thandi hawa key neechey remote sey kheltey huey,yeh sochtey huey 'aaj ac jyada chala hai ab do din nahin chalaunga,chupakar rakh dunga remote ya cell nikaal kar, or do din bacha kucha khaakar pet bhar liya jaayega. Yehi hai jindagi or iski jagtojahat, bijli key bill ki chinta or jyaada barish sey pareshan hua ghabraya hua dil soch hi betha firsey ek baar or keh daala khud sey, chalo aaj kuch meetha h jayey, bade haath or kadam fridge ki or,to dekha icecream pigal chuki thi, fir socha isko milkshake samaghkar pee hi lu , thoda Internet chalakar kuch whatsapp karkey,khaney ki wait kartey huey kab waqt nikala pata hi na chala. Ab ac band kr diya aakhir main,,pankhe ki hawa key neechey bethey huey kaan khol kr ghanti ki awaaz suuney ko betaab,darwazey ki or jald badtey huey,or paisn ka khulla change tatoltey huey, faaltu light pankha off krtey huey, kitchn sey bartan lakar tabley ki mej pr saza daaley hain. Intezzar or bhookh ney masroof kiya hai thoda,waqt ko thaam liya hai. Likhtey sochtey baji ghanti, ek haath main khulley liyey, bada darwazey ki taraf, leykr seedha andar, khatam kiya ,jaan main jaan ayi jaisey...kuch der baad sambhaal kr bacha kucha, ek choti si walk ko nikal pada,mausam ka haal chaal maloom karney. Fir thodi der internet or laptop, saath maih music. Abhi tak aaj cold cofee ka zikra bhi nahin aaya. Fridge main bwnayi hui koi rakhi hi nahin aaj. Banayunga,thodi der main soya nahin to. Ab raat ho chali hai. Cooler is room sey us room ,or fir jyada betaabi par ac ka remote dhoondta hua haath, kuch der tak whatsapp or facebuk par thaki ungaliyon ko bistar par araam deyta hua shareer. Kuch nayi purani soch key hawaaley apney beetey huey palon key saath aaney waalon key baarey main chintan main magn yeh dil or dimaag. Kuch hasi thitholi,bitching, kaam kaaj,khana peena, sanjeeda or natkhat si baatein. Yun hi ek or din, dopehar,shaam or raat kati.ek or. Mathematics ungaliyon par hisaab karta hua dimaag , or anginat soch dil main leykar,fir jaaney ko hai ek nayi si sapnon ki duniya main.


Today(Aaj), It continued the same half day with rain, and the Electricity Issues Sorted taking in more than 2 hours or so!. Asking GOD to Stop Rain for a while, and it worked like Magic, Rain Stopped pouring the work was done and it started drizzling again! Made cups of Tea for the Electricity (3 Musketeers - that came in to solve the wires issues at home form the Pole and so on! - Much relieved to see my Electricity Bills, (Work's fine for me), Happy that I have made an effort to use it in/to the best possible way! Shifting between one room to another, with one light n fan off and on to the shift in and out - to n fro that house and out! Cleaning the Leaves, Sweeping the Water Out - Draining it all! & in between had no time that could have got to eat something! Noon it is now! I guess No plans as of now for whats for Dinner! as of now. kept 4 glasses of COLD COFFEE in the fridge(Ma@Energy Drink), & waiting for some parcels to be delivered from some Online Shopping thingi, with already a confirmation call received and sms on my cell! Waiting for it! One of the awaited Online Shopping thingi returned back, while I was busy opening n checking the other one delivered half n hour back! with my phone in the different room! - Awww, why I did not carried my cell with me , anyways! hopefully shall await for the same meanwhile, Happily cooked, Idli@Home, to go along with the left over yesterday's stuff, ordered, Just took a bath after the whole drizzly drizzled - all day long weather! Checking out some more online shoppe thingi and meanwhile addressing to friends n relatives, over the phone and whatsapp and fb! - To top it all of , Made Besan Key Laddu(experimented a new thingi - mixing n matching it with pea nuts this time, along with the Revadi, adding in Almonds (Badam) on to it! I tell u, some things just don't go waste anytime,and don't get spoils, u can just use them with the right thing at the right time, and it turns out really great! - Remembering Mom, made something sweet! - For dinner part shall eat 4 Idli's kept, if I feel hungry that is! & hog on to it! as n when I feel the urge to it!, Da same, cycle the same routine, all the while. almost same, went off! and so it goes on! - Anonymous 36, Delhi, India

Sunday, July 7, 2013

Mr Lecturer

It was just like one of the days to my Regular College Routines! Monday & Tuesday passed like just another day,at College Then came Wednesday.

Last Wednesday, during my accounts period, I Stood there, for an ongoing attendance and when it was my turn I just smiled at my friend(The Mr. Lecturer) and gave out my role number to him. He stared at me for a while and said rudely "I am not going to consider your attendance as you aren't attentive in class"initially I considered it to be a joke,but he repeatedly kept saying that he honestly/seriously meant it, & asked me to get a note from my mom. The following day, I panicked as to what mom would say, I was frustrated down to the core with him, felt like breaking down into tears, but didn't react(stood there Motionless as if everything just came to a one minute silence/pause! In a couple of minutes he came to my chair and handed me a book, assigning me a duty to get photocopies of particular pages for the whole section. I told him that I would do it for him on a condition if he would consider my attendance, else I would ask the Assistant Class Representative to do it for him. He got mad with me hearing that & turned his back towards me and walked away. We had the closing prayer in a while after which I was called to his department and was told " Are you a Magnet? Everyone seems to be attracted towards you?" I didn't follow what he meant by the comment he made and took it as an insult. I was completely shattered & could not concentrate over the college Introduction day practices and at home all that while.

The next day when he came to the class and I kind of purposely ignored him, bending down my head towards the floor, not a sight at his face while he stood there explaining(teaching) the lessons & asking questions. He too sounded very "Mr. Serious" & never cracked any joke's all that while. Left the class immediately after the bell rang. Meanwhile during the break, when I visited the college cyber and logged onto a social networking site,I happened to check my inbox and what I find there was - a message from him - "I heard you were hurt by my comments,I am really Sorry" ! Reading the message, to my utter surprise,looking at the monitor screen. wondering - "Imagine a lecturer saying sorry to a student"! I was overwhelmed & thought of compromising myself.

A little Later, We were suppose to submit our accounts notes to him, and I had submitted my book without writing or pasting a label(my name) on it. He sent a word with the Assistant Class Representative that "I hadn't submitted my book" - hearing that, I immediately rushed to his department, entered, & started talking to him politely with a huge grin over my face. He too couldn't control laughing the way i conversed with him. He heard my explanation about not writing the name, gave me the book and I left. After an hour when he was back to the class he was normal & I myself was more alert & attentive, taking part,listening to all that what he had to say/teach, interacting with him during the whole session.

Now everything was back to normal and I no ways had to suffer the strain on my neck by purposely "Bend-ing it like Beckham"(Female Version) for an hour again.! That was how my Wednesday started & came to an end(with a Happy ending to it - Just like one Soap Serials, Bollywood Movies).

- Anonymous, Female'16 (Bangalore)

The Summery WALK




Had to do this Bank Work so I decided I need to go out and get it done. I walked few miles, and then I could not get a Rickshaw, So I decided to walk it all!. With the earphones in my head, Listening to what not, All mix...ed & all jinxed! With a bag hung on my shoulders sideways, with cell phone in ma pocket. I am sure you listen to the details of the music n its lyrics, and get to know much more of the actual meaning and the whole detailed bit of it, while u have nothing else to do, and only best you could do is listen to it! Walking down the road, wid a little heavy leather canvas sandals, thought I thought I should have taken up the rubber chappal, would have been a little airy & easy! With cut sleeve t-shirt I was wearing and a full length parallel, (that also from short to the long one- changed twice) before I left house!

1.5 km of distance covered to the destination, & stood there with my token and filled up the needful forms etc, while plugging off my earphone, and the cell phone went on loudspeaker by default, & the song that was playing was Munni Badnaan Hui Darling Terey Lieyey! Good Lord, without even turning back to notice who all was hearing to it, or had there reactions to it, I closed it, with pen in my hand, the form under my shoulder, the bad (i don't know where it was) ducked by cell phone in the back with the earphones, while I noticed, a slim trim, middle lower class lady in a blue saree with a big red bindi( I could not get an English name for it) looking at me, as If I was weird or I looked stranger & foreign(firang) to her. & sat back on my chair.

I met this guy, young school going aged, (not sure if he did go to school or not), As he approached me, I thought now he would ask for the pen, and I said fine I shall give it to him! (Just a Rs. 5 Reynold pen, & I would not even ask for it back if he forgets to give me back) He came to me saying Bhaiya ‘Ek from fill kardogey, Atm ka hai! (Brother, will you fill this form for me, its for the ATM purpose), to which I sweetly responded yes of course but you will have to wait for a while, since my number was flashed & I had to attend the person in charged to get my work done, for which I was here! I approached to the counter. Waiting 5 minutes, to being attended, & then I stood there wile my Account was being tallied/& form checked, ( This person always tell me, Please have a seat, & I always remember telling him no its absolutely fine!( I guess the more they ask you to sit on the chair, the more late they take to work, since they see that you are pretty much comfortable enjoying the chair, & least bothered looking at the time, or looking at there faces, wondering what the heck are they doing ,taking in so time, Why don’t they just do it, & get it over with.

And Then the usual time they take to get the work done, say about 10-15 minutes it took, though was lucky it worked real fast, else I would assume it to go for half an hour to 45 minutes. Done with the Work, I decided to leave other minor works since the major one was completed.

The going was decently easy! But on my return! I decided I will walk again, since I asked to Rickshaw Pullers if they would do, they said not going that way sir, & the other one said, it’s to hot, don't feel like going! On my way back! Half way, now I was getting a little freaked up! (With Sun Tan, coming to my mind, too, the sweat that was dripping off my face, and neck, with my hair coming on my face, irritating me more, with a thought again, why don't I get y hair chopped more, the tiny winy ones, will feel less heat on the head then, ending it here - the thought, I move ahead, as If I carried myself forward, since my legs would not move, & I would feel the Sandals that I was wearing were heavy and not lifting up off the ground, I somehow managed to,,,,move on,,,(for once thought what If I carry them in my hand, but the heat would burn my bare feet, (& passers by would think me to be a double weird, foreign(firang) Mad Guy! The music now seemed to be slow too, with cheerful fast peppy number in the starting when I was coming ,,,to the slow stagnated ones while I was going back! More then a half way crossed, there I saw some rickshaw-pullers, but decided would walk, - at least try to make it possible, to reach home on foot, As soon as I came nearer to my House, I felt If sum one could give me a lift to the little distance that was left, else I could have got wings that could suddenly heave appeared from no where, or a miraculous effect, with a blink of eye, I was in my house, sipping the cold water, sitting in my room with air conditioner on!

I was like half dead, just my foot knew what they were doing, and the rest of the body did not knew anything, just ears to the head, the music that flowed, energizing me to carry the flow and keep moving, keep going.

Two - Three People must have honked, passing my in there cars, I could not notice or hear, since I had my eyes a little closed, for I did not wanted to notice how far it was left ,still to reach home sweet home, and the heat was making me keep my eyes close often, & the tiredness made it even smaller.

One Man Stopped me, while he was coming from front, not actually bumping right into me, but pretty much close, He called me to his car, ,he stopped it, & he said, With your eyes closed & ears closed, you got to be kidding me, come on kid, grow up, what do you think you are doing, where do you think you're a walking blindfold! - Beta, Kaanon Main tumney yeh laga rakha hai, Aankhein tumhari band hain, Kya ho kya raha hai! He said, and I said Sorry Uncle, I know what you mean, will take care of it from now on. & he went & so did I moved on to my next slow steady baby steps.

A Little more closer to , near to my lane, I energized my self again, (& the peppy number came up, on my music track), & I was in speed again! As soon as I approached the Gate to my home, & as I moved forward, I would only want to see the Gate of my home, and nothing else but enter inside! I thought to myself - how wonderful it would have been if the fans running outside the houses with a young guard sitting in there could give me a five minute shelter, and hand me a chilled glass of water, & the next guard (Old Guy) with a hand fan, out of the house, with a smile I passed by, & said to the guard, It’s too Cold! , he smiled & said yes it is. Just few houses away to reach my place, I wondered if sum one could open the door for me, and stood at the gate welcoming me with Water, & get the Air Conditioner of my room on, while took a little time to enter. Alas I was inside the Gate, What a feeling of Content & Relief - sigh. Pulled out my earphones, searching for my keys meanwhile stepping closer to the door, deciding on to what shall I have, chilled water, or the cold coffee, as soon as enter in, and open m fridge, I was In now, and the first thing I did was exactly the same, removing my clothes, sipping the Cold Coffee, & a glass of Chilled Water form the fridge, I threw myself on the bed! It took my ten to fifteen minutes to get normal! With a sharing of the Walk I had to two people, one my neighbor & one my friend, who called to ask, if the Banks’s work was done and over with! I was at ease! Decided I need to put this thing on the blog, & I started to write, before I did forgot any of it. I look forward to the second bath again, and then couple of things to work on, and think about, Dinner, & so on, for the night, and the rest of the Bank Works to be done tomorrow or day after! I happily normalized myself ,quenched myself to the heated me.


I guess my walk to couple of miles, a 6km almost, approximately, was worth for, Delhi saw its first Monsoon rain today at almost 17:00 hours! That made me forget all the pain that I took to walk. the Rain - ( just wiped it off my face) as I went out to get wet, & came back in with my cup of hot coffee, sitting down to finish up this writeup! Though a small shower of rain, but worth ,changed the weather, and made it all wet, killing for the time being the scorching heat, the sun hidden ,& clouds in the sky! Why don't this weather stays the whole summer long! - Anonymous, 35, Delhi, India

My INTERNSHIP With Ms.Veteran



I am 20 yr old, a Designer passed out from Pearl Academy of Fashion Institute, Delhi & Its ridiculous how design veterans treat freshers!  I was treated the same way' & here it is, & later I had to quit.

First of all some of them don't know how computers are being used and they expect freshers to do more from a computer & fight with it,strangling it to the best optimum way to give all more then what actually a software or feature could provide.

These high placed reputed Designer's exploit ,cheat and insult their interns for that, in spite of understanding and learning & experiencing, teaching, and making things more simple for them & each other vice-verse!

What I personally think, Learning from a young person is always safer to join an old person who has no idea about how modern design could be. I am definitely not anti-veterans but its just that few of them are just depressed souls who shower all their frustration on their interns and juniors. A person of a rather sound mind & of mature intellect should respect other person whosoever it be, even a fresher irrespective of their position not because they could most certainly do good in life and become famous & have name for themselves, or really be happy doing what they did best! They are humans too!

And being in a high position gives you no right to treat anyone like dirt/shit. The point is that almost every one would exploit you if you are a fresher but you must decide, who's worth suffering for!

Feel free to walk out of a place that gives you more of exploitation than learning !

At first I was so keen to join this designers office and on the very first day I was asked to write the 2 decade+ journey of the designer in the industry and many such tasks. As a design intern I did all the tasks given, which no ways was related to design at all. Along with it, came the other tasks like: Backing up the data of the computer systems and checking the video backups if the ran correctly, making lists,lists,lists and lists of all the nonsensical things like these.

Working under a big brand does not always get you the greatest of the learning's !
So do what you love, love what you do. Life and time's too short to spend on people who suck the happiness/learning and peace out of you.

No one is worthy of playing with your self respect, all the more also when you are correct in your own place & tell everyone that the new generation clearly knows the difference between right and wrong n does not support ass licking morons anymore.
CHELO KA ZAMANA GAYA!  (No One is Anyone's Slave/Servant, Gone are those Days, when it was like that way back).

Right is right ,wrong is wrong" Irrespective of the positions that people hold!

Finally I am over this situation by now, and moving on
& I don't think I shud ponder over it
Any more.

Anonymous,20, Delhi(Female)

Tuesday, June 11, 2013

Life is Good - My HEART Surgery



I am on my way to my neighbors house to check on their baby chickens, they are out of town. I am listening to my creek which is roaring from the Spring run-off. Mt dearest friend of 40 years is coming from Santa Fe ,New Mexico to visit me today. She is an avid Tango Dancer as well as a very successful business woman, she has a shoe and Accessory store in Santa Fe. She hasn't been up here to visit in 15 years. I usually see her in Santa Fe because our band goes there to play about twice a year. I have a congenital connective tissue disorder called Marfan Syndrome, I am going for another open heart surgery to replace my Aorta. Then later ,I will have another operation to do the Lower Aorta. This is a very big endeavor for me but it will save my life ,so I am happy they have the ability to do this. I will be recovering most of the summer but I hope to get back to my music as quick as I can because it is the best therapy. I know that my angels will be assisting me and I Let Go and let God. It is still a little scary for me but I have many friends praying for me and helping me. I am very lucky to be blessed with such great friends with great philosophies and it amazes me how small the world is and way around the world to feel a connection with them is wonderful. I live at 7000 ft. so there isn't much of a growing season here but my friends in the flatland have beautiful gardens and they share their vegetables with me.
I have taken up Tapping as a way to deal with the stress of it all and it seems to be helpful. As only my fellow Marfs can truly understand, I always say. Be in the Moment. Life is good.
What a shock! when my surgeon said there was a communication gap and my surgeries didn't get in his book and he as buying a house this week and has to move his family. I was so surprised because I was gearing up for it all. I am actually glad to have more time to get a little stronger and better prepared. Well, life is always full of surprises and one has to trust that the Universe has it's own sense of timing and our limited understanding does not see the big picture sometimes. I want my surgeon to feel his best and as he put it ,he wants to give me his full attention. These are big surgeries. I found out that I am having the Elephant trunk procedure, it is truly amazing what they can do. Now my surgeries are postponed. I still am having the Catherization soon.

Glad I get a little more time to prepare and enjoy the beautiful spring we are having . The lilacs are in full bloom and the creek is rushing. I am trusting that I am being guided to divine timing for the surgery. I would like to start the process so I could get to recovering but also I think I can use the extra time to be better prepared. I have a yoga breathing cd and a creating mindset for successful surgery cd that I am going to work with.Thank-you for your bright messages from all the way around the world. I feel so blessed by all the good energy coming my way. In Love and Light


- Anonymous, Female' Salina, Colorado

Wednesday, June 5, 2013

Just Could not SLEEP



Lied down on my Bed, after couple of Interactions and go through on the Social Networking Platforms! Tried to caught hold of the Sleep a bit early! “Thought would be a good idea to - go by the saying “Early to Bed, Early to Rise, makes a Man ,Healthy ,Wealthy & Wise, but I got to know recently thought some Survey thing, that the People who are actually Nocturnal, and Stay Awake, are the ones who are more Brilliant & Intellectual, & they tend to become one. Good Lord. Is that so, well I don't know, so cant comment on that! Ok doing away with that piece of info away in my head for the time being, I eagerly willingly accepted the first one.

So I laid and laid on the Bed, adjusting my water Cooler to my bed, straight on to my face, I guess I have a habit of having that little sound while I sleep. Else I feel something is missing, besides my Air Conditioner on and off simultaneously & so the fan! Well 3 things that would have put me to Sleep, & yes a small glass of milk, that I willingly had to take, since lately was cutting on to the Milk & Milk Products, and doing away with whole lot of things as per my fitness regime. So here I was on the bed , lying adjusting my pillow, & there it all started!

Chanting few hymns, and then Spiritual Religious Chants, a little bit of Meditating in between sitting up right, for much long, then as if there went this Singer from somewhere inside me, because I was carried away with many thoughts wondering my mind,(huge list), & making me sing all sort of self made , on the spot’ gibberish driven poetic lines, to ghazals, and carrying myself to a world of emotional journey to a pleasant peaceful one! This went for a long ,say one hour for sure!

I even became a static jogger, off the bed I jumped on to the floor and started jogging, keeping myself fixed on one place, then off to bed again, after getting a little tired, Then the leg cycling started on the bed itself, and a couple of exercises, from deep breathing too to others! (health conscious) me huh!. Then again I was caught with the flow of for a little half an hour sleep I got eventually, I dreamed of useless things and people all around me, from communicating on these so called social networking sites, to all the communications I had , to the people I met, to the relatives and friends, to the Cold Coffee thought troubling me in between, to the stuff in the fridge that was to be taken care of and sorted, to the areas of the house that needed to be cleaned, and so on! & the very thought of it just woke me up, and I was on my feet again! Switching on my Laptop again, connecting my net, to check all the updates, email’s, and notifications etc, to side by side filling up the filtered water, and brooming my guested leaves in the balcony & the entrance, & not the least, making Cold Coffee, churning my Mixer, and cleaning the utensils, & sorting out the waste & the garbage to be done away with.

Making faces sitting in front of the mirror next to me, while on the laptop. Too looking at the little inches or centimeters, if I lost any, in a day, huh! Thinking about getting my hair more shortened, to a couple of Online Shopping to be done with the available credits to my disposal! I am done with some of the bank work, and stuff, Just need to go out, if the weather is a little more friendly, would do the needful and would come down home. That’s what’s planned as in of now.


I fear I am not getting tired or sleepy at the moment, but would lie down a bit for a while who knows if it comes! & I would be up by noon, for all the work that is in pipelined to be addressed and done with.! - Anonymous, 35, Delhi, India

Sunday, June 2, 2013

A CALL to Nepal



A 30 Minute Call to Nepal, from 11-51 to 12:30 to a Virtual FB Friend! after a while of knowing this person. for not even much of time on FB, & this was yes my first call! This Person I heard was Communicating in his Nepaleese-Hindi Mix Language, thought I could get most of him, what was being talked about, asked and told! The Last words in English that I heard from him were, Good night & Bye! Amazing part was I was told, on how he remembered all the little things, of mine, each Status Updates that we seen & each chats that we did! From my being busy with the chores at home (Cooking, Sleeping, Eating, Washing, Cleaning) to the minutest of details of living and surviving on a cup of tea & coffee, too doing the work I did, and kept myself busy On this persons referral to my saying sometime back, shall call you someday! I was made remembered to "You were to call , what happened to that" I decided I needed to call right away and talk to this person no matter what, irrespective of bothering for the Bill, or the time of the Night, First I end up dialing the number without a code, which was picked up by a Rude Voice, saying hello Twice, and I banged the Phone. (feeling little not so very welcomed), then confirmed the number again, and prefixed the code, & re-dialled the number, good that it was picked up, in one cal, & attended, mentioning my name, that sounded nice. We had been on Fb for a while now. The best thing was that the person was a Osho Follower & had much to share and experience at a younger age, 10-12 years younger to me) as I was told, so I could only assume, & believe as of now! Asking me about Dynamic Meditation & then complimenting me, that my pictures did not matched my age, nor did my voice! I sounded much more young by pictures and voice! (told to me by many others as well)
 
I was told you are similar to one of those saints who eat less, sleep less, ,to which I said that's precisely a nice idea, how about changing my name prefixing "Baba"/Priest prior to my name (and adding a little something at the end of my name, and making a new id, with a new me, with a precisely appropriate photograph of me in the manner that defined me well! - i was a good idea, that I was told form the other side! Well I was told then you could add all the fellow saints, in your that Fb id, to which I responded, Its little difficult to say that, because I don’t find much rare and finest of people, leaving some very few, who are real saints, and are non-maeterialistic in approach & life, detached, from all the comforts of life, seeking no pleasure, and available and living in purest of form! to which I was replied again by a Yes! making myself sure, that my perception of being judgmental was absolutely right.


I was asked to visit Nepal, Leaving away all the busy schedule of life, and come and have fun, enjoy the nature and the climate, and the greenery & everything that this small place had to offer. ( having a dream from my childhood to visit & see Nepal) I wonder, if it would ever come true, I don't know, Don't think so.

Again I was asked, why don't I get married, to which I said, I guess i am happy and in content being alone, with no more obligations and explanations and relatives to bother myself with and upkeep with all the formalities to the core. I guess I have learned to live alone, and that suffices me. Not knowing that life has to offer me ahead though, where it would take, as of now, No!

Precisely asking me what exactly you do and all, to my trying to explain a bit, and said later in detail ,,not now, its not the right Time, to focus my brains in the derailing at this hour of night or day, whatever I might call it.

Yes! I was reminded again for the Book on Osho, that I was asked to research & get and see if it was available in the Market & send across via courier/post to Nepal.
Though I did not wanted to end the call, but there was absolutely nothing to talk much about, since I thought would be better to chat much more typing more often and sharing out the details before we talked again! The person on the other side told the same, it was no use wasting money on a blank talk, & once you have something to share about, that you decide that you want to share with me and talk about, you should call me up!. That was a sweet gesture! (though we had a lil intro about each other, family, background, work, life, etc) but we needed more to know each other for a much more comfortable friendly talk).

My Sleep as if went away for I while (happy me, that I would be able to have a glass of water, & maybe milk too) & then go back to sleep, after a while, after I am finish with me net business!

Prior to this, I was in a position to fall on the bed before & I wished with a big yawn, that there was no more Message on the FB Chat, & I should not see no more further pop-ups. Asking this person if I could call you up talk rather for a while instead of typing on the keypad & looking at the screen, since I was on the bed & as if it wanted to sink me inside it deep, calling me to the world of dreams! But I would not abruptly end the chat. thought I made a little note and put forward, 3 times, GoodNite, bye, I am Sleepy. to which I was told ( I would tell Osho, this guy talks to me rudely, & then Osho will teach you a lesson, asking you why did you do that & will punish me) in a friendly sweet tone - chat! to which I could feel a kid inside that wanted to chat and talk, as if was out in the lonely world far, away with nothing else no one else to share and talk too, or discuss things outside the Virtual World!

 
Talking to a friend prior on the phone (discussing what I had ordered for dinner to Goodnite, Cya & Bye, to Talk to you soon in the morning!, simultaneously, finishing with my Dinner & chatting with a friend of mine form Bangalore (discussing Mushroom-Cottage Cheese Salad, with Baby Corn dipped in garlic Sauce, to College, to Blogs, to Education/Career & marks, too the new blue dress for the college, to some guests and party's & wedding lately,& hogging on to Paneer(Cottage Cheese) & Salad's etc etc. With a quench to reach out to my fridge and drink water after my dinner! I paused, kept myself thirsty! I said what the heck, let it go! I shall as soon as I get time! I end up chatting with this person again, had not seen him for a while much on FB Online on the Chat, I was message’d with a Sweet name as usual that I was called by this person ,& I would immediately reply yes I am here. & the conversation would go on! Amazed to know that I was about to go to sleep at 10;00 hours, which was not so likely me, that I was before, but I guess, Now the Summers have made me more lazy & immediately after my food I kind of feel banging myself on the bed, turning sides, and reaching all the corners in my sleep, with weird dreams, that I would not even remember when I would get in between or the next very day!
Though who would have ever thought I would ever call Nepal(for the first time in my life, and that to a friend not at all a professional call! I am not sure, where all this leads too, but yes I kept my promise and look forward to the best of our friendship, for I don't control things, I rather leave it on the mercy of God, What is planned and destined is out to happen, and one shall abide by it! Where it takes from a Social Networking add to a call to? No One Knows. No Idea!

I guess now my Sleep is calling me back! & I should rather go Now, I am going to Sleep! Looking forward to Dreams, & hopefully wake up good & peaceful!

Please excuse me for m grammar, & vocab & spelling mistakes if any,, since I am half dozed off already, & I wanted to put it as good as I could remember it, else would forget the minutest of details by the end of the night, & starting of the new day! - Anonymous, 35, India, Delhi.